The mirror reflected her being, as she stood in front of it. “Am I beautiful?” she thought to herself. The crispy mixture of brown in her eyes with a black outline ignited her light, golden-brown hair encircling her face. Her sharp nose complimented her cheekbones. Small laugh lines made a room around the corner of her eyes.
“It’s not good to praise yourself”, her mother had told. “Appreciate other people and love them”, seemed a kind, generous advice. The hidden vagueness of those words made her drop the veil on the mirror, to avoid the beautiful reflection of herself that she had just discovered.
That little girl, holding in all the questions in her naivety, filled the cracks in people’s soul with all the love and affection she owned.
Till the love ran out; not for others but for herself.
The ignorance of the beauty of herself, made the indecisiveness and uncertainty control her. The oblivion soul continues to heal others, only feeling emptier and emptier till she finally questions someone, “Why don’t you love me?”, “Even you don’t love yourself, how do you expect me to love you?”; the brutality of the words shattered the world she had built around.
Once again she stood in front of the mirror, this time without lifting the veil from the mirror, she asks, “Am I beautiful?” The crispy mixture of the brown in her eyes drops a tear down her cheek. The golden brown hair, falling loosely on her shoulder make her uncomfortable. The small laugh lines around the corner of her eyes disappear as she frowns. “Am I beautiful?”, she asks herself again and again till the word “beautiful” loses its touch and reduces its meaning to her, into the word “No”; echoing through the body she once loved.
The veil on the mirror grows thicker every time she asks that question.
Dedication: This writing is dedicated to all those out there who lost themselves in the process of loving others. There is a thin line between being selfish and loving yourself. Choose yourself first.
