You’re 20, and you already find yourself standing at the threshold of an entirely new life. Or at least that’s what they tell you. Only four daunting words persistently traverse through your mind – you are not prepared. Period. You brace yourself for a sudden imposition of responsibilities, a prompt drift towards maturity – but, interestingly enough, you feel none of those traits residing in you. Maybe being twenty isn’t so bad after all, you keep telling yourself, desperately endeavoring to assuage your worries. Maybe contrary to what they told you, you won’t be confronted with the same plethora of emotions as they were, maybe you’d be excused, may be you won’t be asked to join the same masquerade or maybe you’ll find a way out, you say to yourself, clinging to the tiniest thread of hope. Even if hindrances come your way, you’ll circumvent them with ease. Endeavoring to attain your dreams and overcoming any obstacles was never a novel idea for you. Didn’t you ace all those college exams? Weren’t you always at the top of your class? The challenges of life can’t be any different from this, can they? Certainly not, you say, dismissing your fears as a mere figment of your imagination.
Just then, as you’re browsing through a list of grad schools you’re planning to apply to, you’re told that your mother’s friend is coming to your house with her son. Little do you know that this surprise visit will culminate into a “rishta” for you. Hearing this very word, you laugh. Dismissing the notion of you getting married with the wave of your hand, you revert back to the computer screen in front of you. This is insane, isn’t it? Asking you to abandon your education for some random guy they think might be suited to you. The last time you checked, you were way beyond the Jane Austen era. Girls weren’t asked to forgo their dreams to get married on the mere pretext that the guy was rich and hence fit the definition of a “perfect rishta.” Moreover, this idea is definitely not in conformity with the manner in which you’ve been brought up. Ever since you started going to school, you were instilled with the enthusiasm for hard work, the notion of struggling to pursue your dreams, the idea of never giving up on your dreams amidst all crises. Surely, your parents, who taught you to believe in yourself, to never give precedence marriage over your dreams and goals in life would not agree to this. Why is it then, you ask yourself, that Amma is getting exceedingly concerned about the prospects of you getting married within two years? It’s not like she isn’t well acquainted with your struggle to attain the magnitude of success that you’ve attained over the past few years. Why is it, that now that you’ve come so far, your aspirations are being forced into the corner of banishment? In fact, you now remember your Amma saying something along the lines of, “Don’t attain too high a level of education. You might just become too overqualified and won’t find many good rishtas then.” As if finding a suitable guy was the quintessence of education, as if not being able to find a suitable rishta will deprive education of its benefits.
But you decided long ago that you won’t acquiesce, that you won’t concede to their opinion. The societal norms don’t dictate your decisions and you learnt it the hard way years ago, you resolutely remind yourself. The upsurge of emotions gives way to a tiny, hitherto unheard voice inside of you that tells you that things are different this time. It isn’t the society, but your very own parents who’re suggesting the notion of marriage. This time, the source isn’t an entity you’ve conditioned your mind to ignore nor is it something you can feign indifference to; it isn’t an entity whose opinion you can deem inconsequential, relegate to an insignificant level and classify as one of the facades of the much-loathed illiterate society around you. Thus, you’re compelled to ponder over this. You helplessly question yourself – is it time to give in then? Closing your eyes shut, you mumble the most desperate words uttered so far – “I hope not.”
